Letting Go of Worry - The Confidence Clinic

Letting Go of Worry

Recently my little girl started School, I was worried about her as she’s shy and a little bit clingy. I was setting up play dates with her new class mates and fretting over how I knew she’d getting upset when I left her into the class room.
We can all find things to worry about, it doesn’t take us long to find a source of concern if we want to waste our time and energy worrying. We can worry about our health, our weight, our finances, school, career, our children or wider families, our jobs, drugs, crime, tax, the environment….. the list goes on and on. Worrying is stressful, stress causes over 70% of illnesses.

‘Worry refers to negative self-talk that often distracts the mind from focusing on solutions to the problem at hand. For example, when students become anxious during a test, they may repeatedly tell themselves they are going to fail, or they cannot remember the material, or that their teacher or parent will become angry with them if they perform poorly. This thinking interferes with focusing on the test as the speech areas of the brain that are needed to complete test questions are being used for worrying’ Wikpeedia.

However we can make a concerted effort to ‘let go’ of whatever worry we are holding onto, and gripping tightly. It’s amazing how when we let go of the worry things tend to work out and be okay in the end. I’m not saying that we shouldn’t take action, if action is needed. I think being pro-active and doing what you can to fix or help a situation is usually a good thing. Obviously, if you are worrying about a test then study for it, if you are worried about crashing your car, then drive safely and wear your seat belt. However the endless thoughts of ‘what if’ and ‘oh no it’s happened’ are plainly not making things any better.

My little girl is still not wanting to let go of me in the mornings, but I’ve stopped thinking about it. I know it will pass and she will settle in, like everyone does when they embark on a new chapter in their lives. We all have to adjust since life is forever changing.

I know this is a common story but demonstrates the power of letting go of worrying; A friend of mine, who has been trying to have a baby for a long time, finally ‘let go’ and decided that she was grateful for what she had, and lucky to have so many good things in her life. She used to think there was no way she could bear her life, if she was never going to be a Mother. It hurt very hard to see all the other Parents around her. After, when she became grateful and thankful for all she had, she started living again, getting healthy and fit, enjoying life, travelling finding happiness in the every day things. After so many failed attempts, she is now pregnant with twins and ecstatically happy. The worry and stress were removed and she got what she wanted. If only we could all let go of our biggest worries, we might see the answer is staring at us.

Written September 2013

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